Hanging with my sweet amour She came out with a lion's roar Yelling, "I'm going to the corner store, Be back at quarter to four" "Don't slam your pinkies in the drawer" She can be like a maiden from the days of yore Hanging out at Studio 54 Break dancing on the slick brick disco floor With Lionel Richie Who, by the way, was a Commodore One time she gave mouth-to-mouth to a snaggle tooth boar Who couldn't breat right since the Vietnam War Then she played Chinese Checkers with Skeletor And went camping with Eva Gabor
She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice And she's coming home
I got a picture of her down by the seashore Wearing a bikini made of purple velour Her hair's up like Conway Twitty's pompadour With the smile of Guy LeFleur She got the ups and downs like an elevator But deep inside she's a marshmellow smore Can bake a cake as big as Jupitor Either or, Neithor nor She'll share it with your Labrador She can run faster than a blazing meteor Loves Winnie the Pooh and his friend Eeyore Can make a pipe out of an apple core That's a trick she learned from Roberto Parrish Down in Ecuador You know why?
She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice And she's coming home
Well, for sure she opened the door Whipped out a 3-ft fishing lure Sexually, that made me insecure Like the time I was a roadie On Elton John's tour She said, "Let's go catch some Piscatore!" I said, "Beatrice, you don't eat fish no more." She said, "By God, you're right!" So we took ourselves a snore And when we woke up 10 hours later We made Love Du Jour
She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice And she came home
She likes to clean out the attic every now and then She's gonna knit me a brand new golfing bag We gonna watch ourselves a John Wayne movie Then we gonna free all the doggies at the kennel She gonna try on my third grade mittens She'll keep 'em on even though they're way too small Well, she ain't never gonna hurt me She ain't never gonna let me down She ain't never gonna tell nobody I'm afraid of birds and spiders
Well, Bea-bea-bea-beatrice Bea-bea-bea-beatrice Bea-bea-bea-beatrice Bea-bea-bea-beatrice Bea-bea-bea-beatrice Bea-bea-bea-beatrice And she loves Pat Summerall
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