She said it was just a figment of speech And I said you mean 'figure' And she said no 'figment' because she could never imagine it happening But it did When we first met, I played the shy-boy When she spoke to me for the first time, my nose began to bleed She guessed the rest The next day we went on a bus ride to the ferry And when nobody came to collect our fares, why I knew then this was something special I couldn't stop thinking about her And everytime I switched on the radio, there was somebody else singing a song about the two of us It was just like being on a fast ride at Fun Fair- the sort you want to get off because it's scary and then, as soon as you're off again, you want to get straight back on again But oh love is strange And you have to learn to take the crunchy with the smooth I suppose She began going out with Mr. Potato Head It was when I saw her in the car park with his coat around her shoulders I realized I went home and thought about the two of them together until the bath water went cold around me I thought about her eyes and the curve of her breasts and about the point where their bodies met I confronted her about it I said 'I'm the most illegible bachelor in town' And she said 'Yea, that's why I can never understand any of those silly letters you send me' And then one day it happened She cut her hair And I stopped loving her.
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